She is finally learning to smile for pictures!
Monday, November 15, 2010
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Happy Harvest Party
So I am a little behind on blogging.... But the girls had their first school party. They got to dress up like farmers and bring their favorite stuffed animal to class. They had a blast. They are really enjoying school.
Tuesday, November 09, 2010
Sweet Baby Antonio
I keep this blog to record the life of my children. I would be a failure as a mother if I didn't include something about the life of sweet Baby Antonio (aka Ants). I found out I was pregnant in August. It was a big surprise to us because it happened naturally, whereas, we thought we could only get pregnant through infertility treatments. We knew early on that this pregnancy was different. I have a uterine abnormality which leaves me with half a functioning uterus. With any pregnancy, my miscarriage rate is high at about 40-50%. It is a risk that we have to take. It was thought since my last twin pregnancy was successful that this one, being a singleton, would be too. But it wasn't. We knew from about week 7 that there was a small bleeding area above the baby. It grew and grew. Soon enough my entire uterus was bleeding. There was nothing we could do but hope and pray. We lost Ants at almost 15 weeks on October 31, 2010.
As sad as it is, we are at peace with things. We know he is in a better place and his life here on earth just wasn't meant to be a very long one. I found out today the pathology report. We don't really know what truly caused the pregnancy to end. Not only did I have issues, but there were low levels of amniotic fluid and the umbilical cord was tightly wrapped around his little body. If this didn't end when it did, it was soon to get a lot worse. The sex was not determined. The doctor said he could probably have it figured out, but I opted out. I refer to the baby as a boy. In one of the last ultrasounds, the tech and I swore we saw a penis. That was all the conformation I needed.
As for the name...It is a funny story worth sharing. I had 16 different ultrasounds with this baby. I was in the doctors once a week, sometimes up to three times a week. For some reason, this day I had issues with child care and decided it would just be easier to take the girls (and Juan too) to the ultrasound appointment. I had been on bed rest for the last month or so of my pregnancy. The girls knew mommy's belly hurt and that I had to stay in bed. During the ultrasound, the girls watched the screen as patiently as three year olds could. The tech was talking and I was asking lots of questions. Belle out of the blue started talking. "Mommy, what's that?" before I could respond, she said, "You got ants in your belly." The tech busted out laughing. "What did you say, Belle?" I asked. "Mommy, you got ants in your belly!" "No Belle, it is a baby in Mommy's belly, not ants." "No, it's ants" she said as she pointed to the screen. "You ate ants and they are in your belly" she continued, "why did you eat ants?" Everyone couldn't help but laugh at her. I guess in a three year old's mind it looked like ants and to her my belly hurt because I ate them. It was as simple as that. I swear we had a 5 minute conversation about there being ants in my belly. It was the funniest thing ever and it really lightened the serious mood of the situation. From then on, Belle would point out that my belly hurt because of ants and that I should not have ate them. She would often ask if my ants hurt. I don't think she ever caught on that there was a baby inside. So we called him baby Ants... I figured the name Antonio would be a more appropriate, official name for him.
Life is getting back to normal and moving on. The healing process has only begun and I can only imagine it takes a lifetime to complete. Juan and I are so grateful for all of those who helped us out during this trying time. A special thanks to Amy, for watching my kids for all expect 1 doctor appointment. A huge, even specialer thanks to my mom, who will always be there to save day. And to everyone else for their love and generosity. It means so much to know that you have friends and family that will drop anything just to help you.
As sad as it is, we are at peace with things. We know he is in a better place and his life here on earth just wasn't meant to be a very long one. I found out today the pathology report. We don't really know what truly caused the pregnancy to end. Not only did I have issues, but there were low levels of amniotic fluid and the umbilical cord was tightly wrapped around his little body. If this didn't end when it did, it was soon to get a lot worse. The sex was not determined. The doctor said he could probably have it figured out, but I opted out. I refer to the baby as a boy. In one of the last ultrasounds, the tech and I swore we saw a penis. That was all the conformation I needed.
As for the name...It is a funny story worth sharing. I had 16 different ultrasounds with this baby. I was in the doctors once a week, sometimes up to three times a week. For some reason, this day I had issues with child care and decided it would just be easier to take the girls (and Juan too) to the ultrasound appointment. I had been on bed rest for the last month or so of my pregnancy. The girls knew mommy's belly hurt and that I had to stay in bed. During the ultrasound, the girls watched the screen as patiently as three year olds could. The tech was talking and I was asking lots of questions. Belle out of the blue started talking. "Mommy, what's that?" before I could respond, she said, "You got ants in your belly." The tech busted out laughing. "What did you say, Belle?" I asked. "Mommy, you got ants in your belly!" "No Belle, it is a baby in Mommy's belly, not ants." "No, it's ants" she said as she pointed to the screen. "You ate ants and they are in your belly" she continued, "why did you eat ants?" Everyone couldn't help but laugh at her. I guess in a three year old's mind it looked like ants and to her my belly hurt because I ate them. It was as simple as that. I swear we had a 5 minute conversation about there being ants in my belly. It was the funniest thing ever and it really lightened the serious mood of the situation. From then on, Belle would point out that my belly hurt because of ants and that I should not have ate them. She would often ask if my ants hurt. I don't think she ever caught on that there was a baby inside. So we called him baby Ants... I figured the name Antonio would be a more appropriate, official name for him.
Life is getting back to normal and moving on. The healing process has only begun and I can only imagine it takes a lifetime to complete. Juan and I are so grateful for all of those who helped us out during this trying time. A special thanks to Amy, for watching my kids for all expect 1 doctor appointment. A huge, even specialer thanks to my mom, who will always be there to save day. And to everyone else for their love and generosity. It means so much to know that you have friends and family that will drop anything just to help you.
Monday, November 08, 2010
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